The stars didn't show up to lit up the cloudy sky. The humid air was also less friendly - its density hindering the sweat in our bodies to evaporate, thus preventing our natural thermoregulator to dissipate heat to the environment and cool ourselves (HK 114!! hweheh.. o_0). I was already considering riding a Katipunan Jeepney to some damn airconditioned restaurant just to get away from the unnaturally, tropically-humid, sweaty night (it was already 7pm when we got out - nights aren't supposed to be hot..). I remember that it was hot and un-windy that whole tuesday, and the heat outlasting the sun almost became intolerable for me. It also felt as if a crowd of invisible, sweaty people were always walking, sitting, eating, sleeping with you, causing the humid environment. Nevertheless, after charm arrived at the boarding house by i think was already about 7:10pm, thanks to manong taxi driver, we walked to the Sunken Garden for our 3 weeks late final CG meeting. I 'learned' something new, by the way - that 80% of the population of the Philippines work in Makati (n_n) and twas the reason why charm came late (so its either those working outside makati are just part of the 20% of the population, or what they're doing is not 'work' at all (0_o) ). After finding a nice not-so-grassy and not-so-dusty part, almost near the middle of the sunken, we settled and i started our CG with a prayer - our last prayer together, as soon, we weren't able to end in prayer because we were reminded of the 10 o'clock UP curfew and were forced to move to jollibee philcoa. We started with giving gifts, and i admit that i feel guilty because i didn't find time (and money..) to buy each one a special, more personal, more "waah-its-so-nice-of-you..", gift - i just gave out some hand-made "awards." It wasn't something of real worth, and i dnt know if it was just me, or guys aren't really into gift-giving..? =S I tried to integrate my affirmations with the rewards but im afraid i thought so much about it the previous night and thus, i wasn't able to put them into words.. (sorri, was it just me, or guys also have "limited vocabularies"..?). Anyways, though humid and we were sweaty and hungry and kezia leaving early, we still managed to go through the gift giving, affrimations, sorry-stuffs - and the rest of the story are mostly CG stuffs and are not for posting in this blog.. =)Mysteriously sounding creatures of the night also appeared from time to time (i think there were two or three of them) frightening us at some point with their creepy voices matched with the thousand shadows in the midst of sunken garden.
10 o'clock then came and the four of us (kezia left early because i think she wasn't permitted to stay long.. =S ) rode a philcoa bound jeep at vinzon's hall to jollibee. I was almost penniless but i still managed to buy a carbohydrate-rich palabok and buy each one of them a shrinked pizzamelt (jobee's pies get smaller everyday..the ones we ate dint even touch my tongue).. We finished eating by 10:45 and preparing to leave, we saw how amazing and wonderful God really is - - it was raining, and we weren't wet thanks to manong curfew and jobee.. the thought was just incomprehensible, but i believe it was just how God shows how he loves His children. (n_n) hwaaah.. mamimiss ko CG!!!
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03/29/06 wednesday, 1:48 pm

nilapat ko na sa huling pagkakataon ang aking ballpen sa answer sheet.. matapos ang ilang paninigurado sa aking mga naisulat na sagot at mapaniwala ang aking sarili na wala na akong maisusulat pa, sinimulan ko nang tumayo upang ipasa ang papel.. paglabas sa airconditioned room, binati ako ng init ng panahon, ngunit sa wakas - natapos na din ang aking sem!!
pero kahapon lang (03/31/06) sumagi sa isip ko kung ano naman ang gagawin ko next week?? hindi ako tulad ng ibang estudyante ng UP na nagkakandarapa na upang magpre-enlist ng mga subject sa summer, o naghahanap ng summer job, o kung ano man.. walang plano sa isip ko na gagawin ko - magpunta lang sa church at magdrums buong linggo.. aalis na kami para sa Kawayan Camp sa susunod na sabado, hindi ko pa rin natatapos yung required book review.. hindi pa din dumidikit sa isipan ko na magk-KC nga ako.. ayaw ko pang maniwala na aalis ako papuntang Bacolod, isang lugar na hindi ko pa nalalapatan ng paa.. at ayaw ko pang maniwala na isang buwan na hindi ko makakasama ang aking pamilya o churchmates o mga malalapit na kaibigan doon, at ang mga kasama ko lang ay mga panibagong mukha.. ayaw ko pa ding maniwala na hindi ko gustong magpunta doon, sa kaloob-looban ng aking sarili, para lang magsaya, magbakasyon, mahiwalay sa maynila, o anuman - ginusto kong magpunta doon dahil naniwala ako minsan, ilang linggo ang nakalipas, na tinawag ako ng Diyos para sa isang gawain na hindi ko pa alam, o ayaw ko pa ding alamin.. lahat naman ng Kristiyano ay may responsibilidad at hindi mas-espesyal ang sa akin, pero naramdaman ko lang na kakailanganin kong magKC upang maging mas epektibo.. wala na akong maisulat.. hindi ko pa alam.. ayaw ko pa dati.. may latak pa ng pagka-ayaw hanggang ngayon.. sa totoo lang, hindi ako excited sa isang buwan ng KC - excited na ako na matapos na ang KC at bumalik sa totoong mundo, sa aking pamilya, simbahan, eskwelahan, mga kaibigan, at malaman ang dapat ko ngang gawin.. isang maliit na parte lang ang isang buwan ng "training" kumpara sa isang buhay na dedicated sa Diyos.. gusto ko nang matapos ang KC.. excited na ako..