for the past few nights, ive been dreaming about me playing drums..

..playing drums on a drumset complete with everything any crazy and hopeless drummer could ever dream of.

a hundred days or so have already passed since i started saving for a single splash cymbal and a clamp, or a snare head, or a brush stick, a drumming cd, or whatever drum stuff i might suddenly think of buying.. a hundred days passed by.. and almost every single cent i saved within those hundred days slipped out of my hands without me knowing it..

or..i knew about it, but i wasnt thinking about drums during those tragic moments and i didnt have time to realize that my dream of 'upgrading' the drumset im regularly playing (at church..) is slowly slipping away.. i used my savings (almost worth two splash cymbals..??? na cheap.. hehe) to buy some gift, treat some people to somewhere, get myself some of this and that - things that i think i need...

maybe i should have focused on saving first before getting my needs for the moment? maybe i shouldve just treated those people to some dirty ice cream or isaw? maybe i shouldnt have bought an expensive gift?

or maybe, i should have just told everyone who are dear to me: "i wanted to give you this or that, or take you to this place, or spend time with you and eat some of those, or i wanted to go there and see you..[oh, its so thoughtful of me.. (n_n) ] but, im saving for something for myself, so i wont. anyway, its the thought that counts, right??!"

im frustrated.

what if..??? oh well..il do it next time...

haha. (n_n)

nah..im saving again..maybe after another hundred days, il be able to save for something that could make my dreams come true - or at least a part of it.. and then use it for the youth camp (at puerto galera..) before i could even look for anything.. then save again, and use it for
another set of gifts, or whatever...

oh well..

i may be crazy and hopeless and .

but life doesnt end in drumming.

..and maybe, something better is coming my way.

..and God is good.

..il be saving again and again - and again, and again, and again.

..il be waiting until that day comes.

..and i shouldnt be blogging right now, but studying for my bio lab exam tomorrow.

[argh.]